Well, you can't say I'm not trying. And those who know me agree completely, they say I'm very trying indeed

Another thing that gets my goat about this jumping on the green bandwagon is the nonsense that politicians feel they must spout.... look at Peter Ainsworth's reply on page 37 of Tescos Green Issue free magazine.

When asked 'How can we teach our children to respect the environment', Mr Ainsworth, Conservative shadow environment secretary replies somewhat piously 'Schools have an important role in educating the next generation about climate change.'
Bad boy, Mr Ainsworth, you didn't read the rubric, did you? Climate change wasn't even in the question, but you had to get in in there somewhere, didn't you?

You see I'm all for respecting the environment. I think children should be taught not to throw litter wherever they like, to keep their environment neat and tidy. It might help by taking them out and about into their locality and explaining the different birds, insects and plants to them. The old fashioned Nature Walk in other words. It's not the answer to the problem, but it's certainly a start.

I mean, what exactly is the point of the average twelve year old ranting at me about climate change and yet knowing nothing about the area he lives in, about the sort of plants and animals that live there, that he is trying to protect? You cannot even begin to think on the wider scale if you remain determinedly ignorant about the world you live in.

Page 38 has more of the same drivel. 'Millions of people in Britain have changed their habits to help save the environment. But we still need to do more...'
Of course we do. But has anyone really sat down and thought out exactly what we should be doing? Ah, recycling. That's a good one. But let's look more closely.

I am quite keen on recycling. Years ago I used to collect empty pop bottles and take them back to the shop for a penny per bottle. I knew a couple of people who used to take old prams up the park and collect old bottles to help eke out the housekeeping. I'm not sure whether today's youngsters would be tempted by 10-p or even 25p per bottle any more, mind you.
But where does our recycling go? To some local factory, there to be sorted and sent to other firms where plastic bottles will turn into warm fleeces and waste paper will be made into egg cartons?

No. Think again. Much of our recycling (in some areas every scrap) gets sent off to - wait for it - countries like China. In other words rich countries are sending their rubbish to poorer countries for them to deal with the problem.

I don't like this idea. It's not really going green to save the planet, is it? It's just pretending to go green and leaving poorer countries to sort it out. In other words, it's cheating.

Just like much of the rest of this magazine. But in fairness, Tesco isn't alone. It's more prominent than other supermarkets, but it's by no means the only one. And it's allowed to be that way by lazy, corrupt, posturing MPs - the people we were mad enough to vote into power last time around.

We ourselves are lazy too. We listen to this claptrap. Look at page 41 where it is claimed that modern dishwashers used just 15 litres of water per cycle 'making them as efficient as the old fashioned method using rubber gloves.' Oh go and boil your heads, Tesco. Fifteen litres? I do it with less than 4. And usually I'm washing up for at least five people, sometimes more.

On page 44 it gets worse. "Be a green goddess" it proclaims. Don't leave appliances on standby. (I tried this, religiously switching off TV, video, etc. last winter. The cold and the damp caused condensation damage and the TV repair man reminded me that modern appliances are designed to be left on standby otherwise it shortens its life.)

'Put a brick or large plastic bottle filled with water in your toilet cistern'. And flush it twice as often. I know, I've tried it.

My favourite of all however was 'Bank online and cancel paper statements.' And then nice Mr Tesco will produce a free, 100 page plus magazine entitled The Green Issue.

Or as Scrooge might have said, 'Bah, Humbug!'

Well, here we go. I have in front of me the free, 114 page issues of Tesco's Magazine, its 'Green Issue.' The cover shows happy twenty-somethings with a wicker basket, picking apples off a tree. The magazine promises 78 ways to 'make a difference.' Jolly good, I say.

So let's see what we've got....

The dreaded phrase 'save the planet' appears in the Editorial, page 3. It promises the answer for almost every excuse not to be 'green.' I dislike the way 'green' is suddenly the keyword for almost everything noble and good. You will see from my header that my own soon-to-be-published book is entitled 'Seeking the Green' . I thought long and hard about that title, but in the end because of the links between my pagan path and nature I felt it was appropriate. Tesco's own 'Green Guilt' however is a bit cringe inducing.

It starts off pretty well, in fairness. There is supposed to be a 'Healthy Living' magazine inside somewhere, past the ads for yoghurt and chocolate. I give up, and go back to the beginning. Then it starts. On page 14 I spot the headline 'Start afresh.' It is an advert for household furniture, appliances and various odds and sods such as cushions and towels.

Now hang on. 'Start afresh.' In other words, buy new from Tesco. No make do and mend any more. Buy new. Think about it. We're going to save the planet by - buying new. So much for recycling then. CHuck your old stuff out and hope that someone else can use it.

It continues.... on page 20 we have 'Face up to autumn' aka buy a whole new range of beauty products. Not - 'how to use what you already have to make yourself look stunning' or 'adapt to autumn'. Just buy new. Hardly the best way to save the planet is it? And you can't expect anyone else to want your old cast-off cosmetics, so into the bin with them. Just remember to recycle the packagine.

And so on. Pot Noodles have a whole page to themselves despite the 'Healthy Living' section. The two sit uncomfortably together.

The real fun begins on page 27, 'Tomorrow's world - the planet needs our help.' I agree with these sentiments. We should be thinking of tomorrow. We should treat the planet with love and respect. I turn over to 'Meet the people helping the world.'

One of these is responsible for 'green products and packagin in all Tesco stores.' (now there's someone I'd like a word with....) Another is an interior designer, helping others to make their homes 'as environmentally friendly as possible.' Aye, there's the rub. 'As possible.' What exactly does that mean? Whatever we want it to, I expect.

Another of these blessed souls is even the Rock STar, Midge Ure, who has lobbied 'some of the most powerful leaders in the world about environmental issues,' and 'headlines a green themese concert in Bath'.

But the real chestnut comes on page 36. There the great headline 'SOS PLANET EARTH' (and no, I'm not shouting, it comes in capitals') grabs my attention. Alongside is a sketch of the globe and the banner 'Wind farms worldwide produce enough power to service 47 million people.' Sounds great, doesn't it. Go and buy your windmills now!

Now calm down and think about it. Forty seven million people. That's not even the population of a tiny island like the UK. In fact, it's only three-quarters of the UK's current population. And that's if we put up wind turbines all over the world.

Okay, I need a rest here from all this ranting. I hope now I have inspired you to try and read between the lines a bit, to realise that 'Saving the Planet' has been cynically hijacked by politicians and big business.

If I recover from frothing at the mouth and managed to spit out the carpet I shall be back later.

I am still having a few problems getting used to my new camera, but this is a photo I took about a month ago, through the car windscreen driving over the Brecon Beacons, one of the loveliest places in Wales. It's like a spiritual balm just to see the place, no matter what the weather.

I thought this might be a fitting contribution (amongst my various rants) to Blog Action day.....

Before anyone starts screaming that I have no qualifications to write on climate change, let me say I’m probably as qualified as Al Gore, who originally wanted to study English at Havard, then changed his mind, got a degree in government, took a religious studies course at Vanderbilt, entered its law school but never actually got his degree. Er – science, anyone? No.

In fairness, George Monbiot, whose achievements include ‘seven years of investigative journeys in Indonesia, Brazil and East Africa’ getting shot at, beaten up by military police, shipwrecked and stung into a poisoned coma by hornets, did study zoology. This hasn't prevented him exploring other disciplines, since he ‘has held visiting fellowships or professorships at the universities of Oxford (environmental policy), Bristol (philosophy), Keele (politics) and East London (environmental science). He is currently visiting professor of planning at Oxford Brookes University.’ He has also won the Lloyds National Screenwriting Prize, and a Sony Award for radio production.

I mention these things because clearly some of the most vocal supporters of the man-made global warming theory are what I would call polymaths rather than dedicated scientists (dedicated in the sense of pursuing a purely scientific career. I am not questioning their dedication to their beliefs.)

Let me set out my stall. I am not a “climate change denier”. Already the terminology of climate change and global warming has taken on a sinister tone, a bit like something from the Inquisition. To deny the existence of climate change is heretical. Some people would gladly organise an auto-da-fe for people like me if it weren't for the fact the smoke might damage the ozone.

But I do not deny the existence of climate change. Of course the world’s climate changes; it has been changing for thousands of years. Even I learned about that, years ago in school. It’s nothing new. At one time there were dinosaurs the size of the town hall scooting up and down the land, the next thing Wham! All turned to ice.

So the idea that our climate may be changing again is nothing new. I don’t have a problem with that. It’s the idea that nasty, wicked, Mankind is the sole cause that needs looking at.

Now, I’ve no doubt that homo sapiens treats planet earth abominably. Indeed, the relationship in some areas could be termed abusive. I believe the earth needs protecting, cherishing; it needs our love. It’s a worthy cause, one of the most important things we can do not just for ourselves but also for our children. But what I intend to do today is to look at how the whole shebang has been hijacked. Serious science has been turned into the handmaiden of the politicians and big business.

Tylluan, using materials freely available and hopefully a smidgen of common sense, is going to look beneath the gloss and see exactly what’s out there.