Well, I see some of you have arrived already! It's a bit damp here today, but Mr Penry has got the bonfire going nicely with the help of a few bottles of white spirit. There'll be no more decorating around here until the smoke dies down!

Despite my plans to have a load of pretty fireworks, Hell's Kitchen appear to have brought in their usual boat load of semtex and have started setting that off.

There are plenty of jacket potatoes in the fire here and they should be ready to eat at about 9 o'clock. There are also plenty of sausages again (pork and veggie) and big bowls of faggots and peas. To any visitors from over the water (i.e. the US) I should here explain that faggots are a Welsh delicacy from minced pork and liver, seasoned with sage and onions. Just in case anyone had the wrong idea....

The Guy is in flames at the moment - judicious use of white spirit ensured that his head did stay on this year instead of flying off over Mrs Anubis Evans' house. There is no truth whatever in the rumours that this year's Guy was based on her. Nor is it based on Pope Benedict, or Posh Spice. If you must know, it was supposed to look like the Terminator.

As it is so chilly here I have laid on lashings of punch and mulled wine, also a few bottles of Famous Grouse for those who fancy it. For those avoiding the demon drink there is also hot honey and lemon, and hot cocoa.

I have had to strap down the metal dustbins again this year to prevent someone (he knows who he is) from placing bangers in them. I know it's fun to watch dustbins jump six feet in the air but be fair, tomorrow's bin day and the dustbin's full....

Someone asks every year for the recipe for home-made jumping jacks, and my answer is always the same - I am not giving it. Jumping jacks are dangerous and they frighten the animals.

Just because my great grandfather used to make them and throw them amongst the guests at the vicar's garden party does not mean I approve. He used to cover the trees in his orchard with cow dung to prevent the boys from stealing them and I don't approve of that either (the cow dung or the theft!)

I am hoping that Philghodg is going to DJ for us again, and I can see Artemis Toxia has already primed her fire arrows...

Anyway, I hope you are all enjoying yourselves. Please pick up a broom to fly home tonight to avoid drinking and driving!

Don't forget tonight sees yet another party chez Penry - Bonfire Night! As at Halloween, food, bonfire and magic are provided, and this time also fireworks! Also there will be courtesy broomsticks so that nobody will be drinking and driving.

Here in the Welsh Valleys Bonfire Night has been under way for the past two nights. Nobody has set fire to the mountainside opposite yet, but it's probably just a matter of time.

The neighbours in Hell's Kitchen usually put on a good show too, so the adventurous among you can climb the walls and have a look at that. Usually it involved burning household furniture and half a hundredweight of semtex. One year they built such a big bonfire they were forced to sit on their roof to watch it and it incinerated all their jacket potatoes.

As it's a magical party you can drop in at any time and everyone will still be there. Hope you can make it!